Reinventing My Soul To Find My Purpose

Today I wake up a 40 year old man that has been down an extraordinary path, tunnels, twists, turns, and all to find my purpose.  As I reflect on the 40 years of my life, the accomplishments, the dreams, the failures, the mistakes, and the heart ache.  I will take time to start a fresh!  I have a chance to take the rest of my life in my hands, and grab it.  As you get older people think that this is it, but I believe I have new chapter.  More to say to the world through my art and mentoring.  I know what makes me happy and I can't give up! I will listen to my heart more, walk with GOD and continue to follow my dreams.  Los Angeles has been a time of growth and understanding of who I truly am.  I am an artist, and I will continue to create art wherever I can.  I must admit, there are many times that I wanted to quit, to give up, to leave it, and just find a white picket fence and big house to hide behind.  I don't know where I will end up?  I do know,  I will open myself up to more, and listen to the depths of my soul.  We will see where the next 40 years take me, but I do know I am open to receiving all the possibilities that life has to offer.

Break Time

I am taking a break from the business, as I can't afford to do workshops right now.  My pocket books are screaming at me, and daddy needs to eat.  Before you know it will be the holidays and no work anyway...  This is hard for me to do, but ever since I called a short time out, I feel my soul lift.  The pressures of the business can give me anxiety that sometimes my soul needs a boost.  I am putting all my focus on teaching, giving back and inspiring my class.  I love teaching so much, but it does not fulfill me like being an artist on stage or screen.  I totally am letting GOD take the wheel, and I feel some big changes coming soon.  I am currently, working on yet another secret project, and I am praying that this works out.  I think this is the path I am supposed to go on, I hear GOD loudly on this one.  As I pray I am trying to do better at listening. I will be back pounding the pavement in the new year, energized and ready to hit it hard.  I am taking the time to reflect and find out where I am supposed to turn.  For the first time I let show business beat me down, but I will not give up without a fight.  I am not finished with you!!!!!  Love to all, please continue to lift me up in prayer.

Please Turn The Light On!

Blogger friends if you ever heard the term "the struggle is real", then you completely understand my life!  I have been dealing with the word "no" for about three months now, in this crazy industry that we call acting...  More then usually for me, and I have fallen into a world of darkness.  Insecurities, set in, and the word I hate "FEAR" wails up into my soul and belly.  This business is hard, and getting people to believe in what you trained all your life for can be daunting at times.  I have casting directors telling me (In Los Angeles Style) how amazing I am, but not casting me in a single thing.  It gets hard to trust your work and trust yourself.  Sometimes I want to quit,  and give up.  The problem is there is nothing else I would rather do, nothing else that makes me whole, nothing else that feels right, nothing else that exudes my body with love like acting.  I can't quit, and now I will just pray that my breakthrough is around the corner.  Continue to keep working on my craft, and come out into the light.  I am broken, but at the point of saying, "Jesus take the wheel".  I will walk with GOD and let him lead my path as I can't do this alone.  Thanks for your continued prayers blogger family.  I hope the next time I write it will be with better feelings toward my art and craft.  LOVE TO ALL!

I'm Black... I Mean I'm Back! :-)

There is so much to catch you up on my blogger friends, as I set out and journey through life.  As I get older my priorities have shifted and I learn everyday the importance of friends, family, and giving back to the world.  I am still in Los Angeles pounding away at a career that is almost non existent.  A dream that sometimes makes me feel defeated.  A place that makes me whole and happy seems like a far achievement.  I have come close to some things in Los Angeles.  Close to booking major commercials, major roles on film or TV, and yet I stand here empty handed.  I also have been blessed to work on some soaps, and low budget films (I do not disregard those achievements).  This blog entry is not to discourage, or make you feel sorry for me.  Trust me it is exactly the opposite.  While, living this artist life, I learned that I am good teacher, and how rewarding this is for me.  I currently teach theater /acting/scene study at two studios in Los Angeles.  I love it so much, and the success of my students is so rewarding.  I also feel closer to GOD as I struggle through this movement of being an artist.  My soul is rewarded when I teach, and I know that once I get my break I will be even more rewarded.  Guess what bloggers?  I have NOT given up on my talents--nor my career.  I am still standing here fighting, auditioning, networking, and believing in my dream.  GOD has not given me all these gifts to act and perform for me not to use them.  I know there is a purpose and a story I have to tell to the world through my art.... This war is not over, and I decided to blog to let you know that I am back and take no prisoners.  I will continue to give back as much as possible to the youth, but I will also continue to fight and believe in my dreams!  Love to you all for your continuous support.  More blogs to come....   I'm Back Boos.....