The Nurses Ball 2013

As many of you all know and if you follow my blog, you know I have been working on General Hospital.  This year they have reinstated the nurses ball, as it is GH's 50th Anniversary.  When I tell you to be careful what you pray for--and get specific with prayers-- cause they will come to light!  I am strong believer in GOD and prayers.  Well, I have been praying, and I prayed to GOD, being as direct as possible to get a principal contract on a soap opera.  As I was sick of doing under 5s, (under 5, when you only say under 5 lines smallest role you can get) and I really feel this genre suits me, as a transition to t.v./film coming from my theater background. GOD gave me what I wanted.... YAY!  He gave me a principal contract for two weeks on a soap.  (Here is the catch) This principal contract was me singing and dancing. Whomp Whomp! I asked and I received, even though it didn't come in the package I wanted.... As I attempt to get away from singing and dancing, so I can be taking seriously as an actor, look where I end up...   On television but back on the stage sort of... I am so grateful for the opportunity, and the fact that things are moving so fast for me here in LA, is a blessing...

With all of that said, my General Hospital experience was amazing.  Going to work, being creative, being on set everyday, was a taste of a lifestyle that I want for my life.  It was a big dream come true for me.  Please watch the Nurses Ball the first week in April, and watch me and the soap stars perform!  This years ball has so many fun surprises, and you guys are going to love it.  It spans from three nights in April, but I am not sure of the dates.  And two of the nights you will see my big high yellow face and dimples looking at you through your TV screen.  It is some really good stuff, and I can't wait for the world to see it.

The cast of General Hospital was so welcoming and our director Larry was just spectacular to us.  Everyone on set including the crew, and Emmy Winning executive producer Frank Valentini was on it... Frank is a strong presences as a producer, but he knows what he is doing.  He is all about the work, but one of the sweetest people in the world.  He and his team has put together something I think would be remembered forever, in General Hospital history.   I have never worked with better people in my life.  I have made so many new friends on that set, and it was a privilege and a blessing to be apart of General Hospital!  Actors gave me there phone numbers, email address, it was like a family, they all wanted to keep in touch.  That cast over there at the GH is something very special, and I thought people should know that....  I give thanks to casting director Gwen Hiller for always thinking of me, and keeping me employed in Los Angeles.  I also a big shout out to Rick Pessagno the choreographer without him none of this would be possible.

When it all ended, of course my cry baby butt, teared up.  This time I know why I cried....  I cried because this section of a dream came true abruptly has ended.  I didn't want the magic and the feeling to ever end.  I can't describe to you anymore how bad I want this thing... If passion can grow; mine has grown bigger and greater then ever expected. New prayer:  GOD please give me a contract role for 4 years are more, as a speaking actor, as a principal, on a HIT T.V. Show.  LOL is that specific enough!!!!  At the end of the day, I am blessed and so very happy...

FEAR

The good news this week is that I am working on the soap General Hospital again, and gearing up to film "The Nurses Ball"! If you are a GH fan you know that it has been ten years since they filmed the nurses ball.  I have been in rehearsals all this week for it, and there are some great surprises to come on the show!  Can't wait until you guys get to tune in, and see all the fun we are having over in soap opera land.

The interesting thing about today is (As I try to stay honest with my feelings) is that I feel this pressure, anxiety, and sadness.  It glommed over me all this morning.  Why do I feel this way, when I am working, doing what I love and making money?  Why do I have anxiety about life?  I try to read books on how to live in the moment.  I even attempt to block the future out of my head all together....  Am I afraid that I won't work again?  Am I scared that when the fun ends, that I will back to struggling artist?  Do I get sick of NOT of having a steady gig?  Do I know what is promised tomorrow?  This life of an actor, the ups and downs can stress a brotha out in a major way.  It goes to show you that the confidence that you have read in other blog posts can come and go so fast.  I am a human, and I am not who everyone thinks I am.  In the midst of all this goodness, I still feel sadness. Today is just one of those days where my emotions are heightened.  Tomorrow I start Deepak Chopra and Oprahs 21 days of meditation.  I think this couldn't have come at a better time in my life.  I think I need it now, and I am excited to explore this fairly new territory for me.  The beautiful thing is that I know this feeling is about to change, as it is Sunday.  I am about to go to church, praise GOD, and get some junk out of my soul, that is weighing down my spirit.  The bible says "GOD has not giving us a spirit of fear, he is giving unto us a spirit of power, a spirit of peace and a sound mind"!  I will take this with me as I go through my day today.  All is good-- my tax return came in--I am working on a soap (YAY) making a nice coin for the week!  However, I wanted to post my true feelings, as I know this all stems from my enemy FEAR himself.